Our online activities form a part of our lives today. We gain access to information that we need for our work, for studies, for entertainment, for our daily lives. Through it we can remain in touch with friends, we can contribute to worthwhile causes, we can use the internet in many positive ways.
The internet also can give easy access to images and sites that may accelerate or contribute to addictive or compulsive behavior related to sex or romance.
If you suspect that your online behavior patterns might not be healthy for you or people you care about please feel free to reflect on the questions below.
1. Do you regularly spend time looking at porn sites, paid sex sites, romance chat rooms, or other sexual or romantic nature sites?
2. Do you sometimes feel that something is wrong concerning your online behavior related to sex or romance?
3. Have you ever tried to stop viewing online porn, sites of sexual nature or romance chat rooms but soon you felt an urge to return and subsequently returned to them?
4. Does your use of such sites sometimes affect your well-being (for example: less sleep, mind preoccupation with what you have watched, mixed feelings after you have watched something of sexual nature or guilt after communicating in a sexual manner with someone on online etc)?
5. If you are in a relationship or married have you ever tried to hook up in secrecy with possible sexual partners you have met through online activities?
6. Do you catch yourself fantasizing regularly about the sexual images or romantic encounters you experience on the internet?
7. Have you on occasions engaged in sending explicit sexual messages, videos or photos of sexual nature to people you don’t know well or to people you have not met?
8. Do you sometimes become defensive or upset if your family or friends comment that your online behavior is suspicious or too time consuming?
9. If you are spending time on any of the above sites have you done so in secrecy or have you lied about it to family or others?
10. If those close to you were aware of your online activities concerning sex or romance would it create pain or upset to them?
The questionnaire was formulated from various sex and romance addiction recovery resources. It is not a diagnosis test but something to provide food for thought and reflection.
Only you know after you answer these questions and have done some more research whether your online behavior might be pointing towards addictive or compulsive behavior concerning sex or love.
After your reflection, should you suspect that you might have a problem with sex and/or love addiction please do not hesitate to reach out for help. Rest assured that you are not alone and many others are going through this.
There are many ways to get help today and one of them is through SLAA. Please feel free to read about the fellowship on http://www.slaafws.org and if you are in Singapore and would like to know more, feel free to reach out through an email to firstname.lastname@example.org